Applause and Approval, 2023

I want the applause, the approval, the things that make me go...

It's hard to encapsulate the feelings that signify this piece but if I had to boil it down to one word, it would be fear. I'm at a place in my life where I am painfully conscious of how much fear runs my life. I will sometimes miss the beauty of the climb because I'm so focused on the summit. I miss the process because I'm focused on the results. Without reframing, I can become so focused on getting the applause and approval. I will need it, crave it. It becomes everything I focus on. Without reframing, I lose sight of what's actually important. In this mindset, I can get blown by every wind and let myself take in every remark, good or bad, to fuel (or damage) my self-esteem. This will not do.

When I step away from the results and get lost in the fun of it all, I become aware of how beautiful life really is. I lose sight of the accolades, the praise, the recognition. I stop needing the approval to keep moving. It's all a perspective shift away from fear and into love.